What happened today. It started pretty well, husband and older went to pray together, older then went to Sunday school.
When did husband’s mood change, let’s think. He was still in a good mood before going to pick up older from Sunday school but his mood changed when he came back.
I fed toddler pasta. Older asked for some sushi grade tuna we had in the fridge. I don’t usually deal with raw fish so I asked husband to prepare it for older but nothing. 1 hour later he came downstairs and I asked him for the 5th time if he could prepare the tuna for older. He was already on the edge.
He prepared it and gave it to older who said it didn’t smell good and refused to eat it.
That was not good.
I started doing laundry because yes it’s true I have a nanny/cleaning lady but she is not very “clean” (just being honest) and I prefer doing laundry myself and as far as I know we didn’t have plans to go anywhere.
Husband hates when I do laundry on Sundays. He hates to do laundry, when he was single he used to have enough underwear to have changes for a month without doing laundry.
Anyway, he doesn’t like to do laundry so I am banned from doing laundry too. Sounds crazy, right?
I don’t mind doing laundry, the same was as I don’t mind washing dishes by hand but I can’t do it in front of husband.
I knew he was almost losing it so I tried to stay clear from him. I was in the basement pretending to do laundry and singing a karaoke version of “Vivo per lei” kind of whispering so nobody could hear me.
I rarely have the house to myself. Older is on Zoom and toddler is not in school so I am literally never home alone.
Husband figured I was avoiding him and said something about it “you complain that we don’t spend time together then you do laundry instead of spending time with your family” but it was said in a nasty tone, not a sweet tone. The tone makes a huge difference.
He was in the front yard with the kids washing the car, why did I have to join?
Then toddler came in crying, he said daddy “yelled at him”. The toddler says someone “yelled at him” it can mean he told him not to do something, he is very sensitive.
And he started crying and crying and threw a tantrum … he was crying calling for … daddy but it doesn’t mean he actually wanted daddy, for some reason when he cries he automatically calls for daddy and this remind me of something.
When my mom used to live with us (for who hasn’t read my blog, she passed a few months ago) my older used to find “refuge” with grandma so if he got upset he would call for grandma most of the times and this would p*ss my husband so much.
Every time older would call for grandma husband would threaten me to kick her out. Lovely, right?
So now he should be so happy that toddler calls him every time he is upset.
So back to toddler, he was screaming non stop, he was trying to hit, kick and bite me, good thing he is a peanut.
I decided that I would take him to shower with me maybe it would relax him.
He did not want to shower with me. He was crying, screaming. I put him in the shower with me and he was still screaming. He screamed for a good 45 min till he calmed down and seeked comfort, he asked me to hug him under the shower. I picked him up and I think the skin to skin also helped him calmed down.
Unfortunately with toddler I can’t force him to seek comfort, he needs to take out all he has inside and I have to wait for him to seek my comfort.
We got out of the shower and went to his room, I was putting his pjs on when he saw a new shirt I bought him (he is a fashionista) and wanted to wear it instead. When I said no a whole new tantrum started. I left the room and he warned me that he was going to take off his diaper and pee on the floor. I wasn’t sure he was going to do it. I went to check and he did it!!!!
I had to “punish” him for this, wasn’t sure how though. I put him on his bed and told him he was in time out. I told him that his behavior was unacceptable and that he should never do that again, understand??? His answer was :”I understand” while crying.
I came back to the room after 3 minutes and he was still crying. He didn’t want me.
Slowly he stopped crying. Then came to look for me and asked me to read him a book. Before reading him a book I explained what happened and I asked him to apologize. He refused.
My kids are stubborn as donkeys.
I tried to explain again and again he refused. He knew exactly what I was talking about but he didn’t want to apologize because he was angry when he did it and felt it was his right.
He is 3!!!!! Oh my.
Finally I convinced him, or better he convinced himself as I can’t really convince my kids, and finally apologized and I read him the book.
The rest of the evening went a bit smoother. In all the drama older was out bike riding with husband.
Husband calmed down finally.
9.46 I still have to eat dinner.